Lezly Mackerel
"I smell marijuana!" '' : -Big Lez '''Leslie Mackerel', also known as "Big Lez" or "Lez", is the main character and protagonist in The Big Lez Show. Leslie is the character that the show is based off. Kingdom Cum Leslie was born on Kingdom Cum, a far off planet where its inhabitants exhibit super strength and extended life expectancies. Leslie, along with his brother Norton Sparkles, both lived in Horizons End city. It is unknown who Leslie's mother is. There came a time where Leslie's dad, the King Larinnox, wanted to step down and allow one of his sons to take his place. Leslie and Norton both celebrated this occasion. To sabotage Leslie's chances of becoming king, Norton spiked his alcoholic drink with an unknown substance. Unfortunately, Leslie had the same idea, and spiked his brother's drink as well. While they were under the influence of the drug, they trashed Horizons End city, and in doing so, their father banished them from the planet and sent them drifting in space and time forever, never to return. Australian Life After an unknown amount of time, Leslie and Norton's space pod crash landed in Australia. After the landing, both Leslie and Norton parted ways to begin a new life. Somehow, Leslie got a job and earnt enough money to buy a house. Roughly 10 years ago present time, Leslie was startled by a baby, screaming on his doorstep. Lezly took in the baby as his own and named him Quinton. Leslie went to the pokies with Mike Nolan, and meets up with Sassy and Donny. Sassy forces him to use the rest of his money, but luckily he wins $100,000,000 which is enough to pay for his spaceship. At the end of Season 2, Leslie gives in and buys Quinton an Xbox. After a confrontation over Norton's birthday party, Lez is arrested for assault, and falsely accused of murdering a sack of cute puppys. Lez is life sentenced to prison. After finding out that Sassy's crew, and Ellis's brother, Sergio are in the prison, they find themselves being rescued as soon as a large Choomah crashes through the prison wall. Leslie then decides to begin a voyage in his spaceship on the way to Kingdom Cum, along with Donny, Sassy and Ellis. Upon arriving, they realise that it has been destroyed and they head back for Earth. When they crash land, Leslie and Ellis fight Choomahs and Leslie comes across their leader, Cecil the Sasquatch. Cecil reveals that he has attacked Brown Town because he wants revenge for the murder of Bumble Brutus. Extremely angry, Cecil throws Leslie off a building. Leslie somehow manages to land on a Choomahdactyl, and smashes Cecil to the ground, through the roof and into the sewers. After losing Cecil, Lez meets up with the rest of the crew, whom are trying to get to the roof of the pink building. After seeing trails of excrement leading up some stairs, Lez is horrified to see King Larinnox with Cecil, who is screaming at Lez that Cecil is the next heir to the throne of Kingdom Cum. After a brief conversation, King Larinnox escapes with Cecil in a large spaceship. After returning from the Battle of Brown Town, he confronts Norton and knocks him out. Lez takes Quinton back into his custody, and tells Quinton he bought him an Xbox. Lez is then found chilling on his front lawn with Sassy. After an unknown amount of time, Lez spots Sassy and his crew installing the Gamma Max 2063 V2.0 Platinum Edition on Sassy's roof. From then on, Lez is a very laid-back person. He encourages his son, Quinten, to smoke cannabis with Sassy and his crew. Choomah Island 2 Before leaving for the most dangerous adventure of his life, Lez gets all pumped up and positive in his bathroom, yelling "I'm big Lez!" and other stuff. He eventually punches a mirror and wakes Quintin up. He tells Quinton he is going on a mission with the boys and that Quinton's staying behind. Donny comes over and they go to the plane the team will be taking. He asks Donny if he found it outside Woolworths, but Donny says they stole it from a military base off the coast of Puerto Rica. They share a joint a take off. During the flight, Lez talks about why he hates Norton and gayness. The plane flies over Choomah Island. Lez skydives with the gang and they land on the island. When they land, Sassy gives Lez a joint a tells him to smoke it when all else fails. Lez reluctantly and confusingly takes it. They equip their guns and supplies and start walking through the island. They all get high on mushrooms and Lez wanders off from the group, following a shining object that came down form the sky. He carrie nothing but a joint and a shotgun. He is alone for a long time and gets attacked by choomahs. He kills them and runs off. He smokes a joint that Sassy gave him and trips out. Sassy explains to him that everything is created by Microsoft Paint and that Lez needs to write his own story, not someone else doing it for him. Lez stops tripping out and starts yelling 'MMMMMMmmmmm' and other words to get him pumped up. He spots the light in the distance and walks towards it. He sneaks up the hill next to it and discovers Norton and a pink spaceship. He startles Norton and chases after him, eventually covering him against a sheer cliff. Norton says Lez can't kill him because he has answers to lots of things. He reveals why Kingdom Cum was destroyed, what King Larrinox is planning and also about cyborg policemen. Norton tries to trick him into being kind and telling Lez to join him and King Larrinox as a family again. However, he hugs Lez and attempts to shank him, but Lez shoots him with a pink gun, ending the long rivalry. Lez is later found by Warning Guy and Sergio (whom had just captured Cecil and Nugget man) next to the cliff. Lez kicks Norton on the sharp rocks down below, impaling the dead corpse. Lez, Warning Guy and Sergio steal Norton's spaceship with their prisoners, Cecil and Nugget man, and hover up above the island. They meet the Sasquatches and Nolan in a helicopter. Lez tells them he killed Norton. The island revealing to be an enormous choomah surprises them all. The Sasquatches escape back to the mainland in the helicopter, but the spaceship is grabbed by the choomah and it throws the spaceship into the lighthouse, Lez however cling to it's arm, taunting and shooting it repeatedly. Inside the choomah, Clarence, whom had fallen down earlier, activates the SasM8 bomb and the choomah island explodes. Lez bodysurfs back to shore and tells them Sasquatches he blew the island up, not believing it was Clarence. Lez and Sassy end the episode by chilling in Lez's front lawn. Personality Leslie sports a Kiwi-Australian accent which drifts between the two. He is forceful and physically tough, but wears a pink singlet and fancies bobble-heads. He's generally laid back but won't pass up opportunities to do drugs and go on impulsive journeys. Hes a narly cunt Lez is highly vengeful and focused behind his glasses and tries to avoid getting too fucked up on drugs. Episode Appearances Season 1 #The Flowers #The Volcano Bong #Norton's Revenge #Meet Mike Nolan #Day at the Beach #Fathers Day #Quintons Birthday #The Cliff Hanger #Lez and Quinton Charge the Scooby Doo Spooky Coaster #The Brutal Truth #Choomah Island =Season 2= #They're Back #The Trippa Snippa #Where's the Gold #Birthday Bash #Busted #Life in the Can #Never Again Land #Goin' Back #Attack of the Choomahs (Part 1) #Attack of the Choomahs (Part 2) Category:Kingdom Kumians Category:Characters Category:Season 1 Characters Category:Season 2 Characters Category:Season 3 Characters